leisure

haip..seronok dpt kuar ngn kak n anak2.. bgs gak tuan hakim dh balik kg..dpt la aku spend time ngn anak2 buah..seronok tgk telatah mereka... kesian kecik dh kena hadapi seme ni..aku hrap seme ni xlame...bia la ianya sementara.. jauh gak aku g shopping..sampai ke bukit tinggi klang.. tp pelik betul org ramai nk mampus..org ramai sgt nk memilih pn susah..size xde la..hape2 laa. skrg ni dh penat rase nk gantung kaki kt atas..nk gerak dh xlarat..

confused

been alone..stay alone..sleep alone..eat alone..
y only sadness been around me..surrounding of sadness.. i keep trying to not involve in this matter but it failed.. no one can understand me :(
what should i do? God please show me the way..
when i decide to have u.. i tot u the one who can understand me..u everythg for me..u r my pulse my soul..
lately i more fragile then before. everytime u revile me it seem like u slicing me into pieces..how could u.. it is tru people may change? totally change after marriage.??
i'm so scared ..i dont know me at all.. im not myself anymore

deep breath

wat the best reaction at tis momment?
should be cruel ..or kewl?
should shown my anger?
again and again he keep repeated same thgs that he already know i extremely dont like..
it look like no respect at me.. keep doing wat he want to..
he like to c me change n be perfect but wat about him? ask ur self ..think deeply..
have a deep breath shima.. only God know y..

juadah berbuka - onde2

Juadah berbuka..kuih pertama yg aku hasilkann..oyeaa...





walaupun xseberapa...tp aku cukup bangga...hahhaha hasil tangan aku n my fren.. well done to my self!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**resepi aku malas nk type..hihih

SebabMulut

biasenya time ni aku sedap tido..ari ni seme spoil..terus xdpt nk tido..air mata bulan puasa pn sudah kering.. xtau nk pk ape..semua aku ckp salah..pengalaman yg lalu membuatkan aku sukar nk terima seme ni. aku xnk idup aku jd mcm yg jadi pada famly aku dulu dan skrg...mungkin kah aku akan jd salah seorg di antara mereka??

luka hati aku xsiapa peduli..kawan2 jauh sekali..famly sama jer..

jahat sgt ke aku ni pada pandangan org? setiap patah kata aku ibarat racun bg mereka.. aku jadi lemah. rase xberdaya sesungguhnya. aku xnk jadi hipokrit. dan aku xkn jd hipokrit. mungkin kebenaran itu pahit..tp itu adalah reality.

sakit aku...susah aku...sedih aku xsiapa peduli.. teruk sgt ke situasi aku ni?? semestinya x..sbb ramai lg di luar sana lebih malang dr aku. buat masa skrg aku hanya perlu kuat.

sudah2 nk mengharap benda yg xpasti...seme tu angan2..sedar la diri sikit....!!!!!!!!!!!! kalau aku terus2 mcm ni...mmg aku xkn maju. buat la 1000 kebaikan...tp jgn harap org akan kenang.. 1 keburukan lebih hebat dr 1000 or 1juta kebaikan.. itu dh lumrah n fitrah manusia. jiwa aku kena kuat,.aku kena kuat

aku digelar mulut jahat ; jahat sgt ke?? how cruel i am?? i need to move fwd.. there should be well planned for my future.. all look to be easy for them..but in deep of my heard it sooo difficult. who will support me from now on? NO ONE rite :"(

it suppose to be happy and exiting coz tis is the 1st year we will celebrate eid together but it seem like to be cold.. problem is my frend no matter i run no matter i go..it there for me..
so no sweat,,,no regret...life should go on...

ramaddan 2010

day 7 already.. again my malas disease melanda..aku dh terlepas 2 forum ..xtau ape nk jadi. pastu keje kat ofis mmg stress..even bulan puasa kea gak tadah telinga dengar user membebel2...bangang btol si project manager yg dh awal2 lari...xguna tol la.
dh balik umh ni malas aku nk igtkan pe terjadi kt csm td... sok masak la presentation with COO of csm... i will commit sucide ..

hurmm berbalik pada bulan puasa tahun ini...amal ibadat aku agak memuaskan berbanding tahun2 lain..mungkin ramaddan tahun ini aku dh bergelar seorg isteri...seronok plak puasa tahun ini..aku dpt rasakan kebesaran dan keberkatan bulan ramaddan..alhamdulillah

hari ni sgt penat..keje sampai mlm..esok nantikan maki dan yelling from user side :(

understanding or patient??

wat the actual meaning of "understanding" ?????? patient???????

one side need to understand another rite.. but wat will be other side feed back??? patient should be attach together to make it stable..gosh it out of my mind .. it so difficult to understand people.. my time is his time n his time only for him..can choose whenever he want and likes..
i hate to write tis word "complicated" .. y i always thinking of tis word only ..every time i face difficulty ..i may think of life is so complicated..sometime it become unfair..
lately facing a lot of difficulty that make me feeling tired .. no one can understand me..even him or her.. y so?? i try to face all problem alone that no mean i so tough to handle all those things .. :(